The Dorkville Meme

The rules are:
Answer the questions as realistically or unrealistically as you want.
Copy the rules into your meme post.
Link back to the person who tagged you.
Tag 5 others

 

1. Where would you live?
Having recieved this assignment from Mert, I would say that Dorkville is the town for me! I would have a house on the corner of Padawan Way and Kenobi Ct in the new Star Wars Subdivision, Empire Acres.  You haven't SEEN a crazy HOA until you've seen men in white plastic stormtooper costumes writing citations for flying a Federation flag in a Star Wars only zone...

2. What would your job be (or if unrealistic) what would you do all day?

I would be that guy who always runs for office, even though no one will ever elect them.  I will be a professional candidate, featured every four years as the giggly human interest story about the little candidate that couldn't.


3.  Who would you spend your time with? Doing what?
Mert is my inspiration for all things dork.  I would spend the time with my fellow guild members.  What Guild?    Why the Mos Eisley Players, Of course!  We re-interpret Star Trek episodes, set it into the Star Wars Universe, and then convert THAT into the shakespearean cant, to bridge the gap and end the terrible strife between the Trek and Lucasian camps.  It's tearing the Dork world apart, people!!!! (sob)

4. What kind of holidays/vacations would you take?

January--we take the enitre month off to celebrate the gods of sci-fi and fantasy.  Asimov, Dick and Tolkien have entire days that are exclusively theirs.

February we dress as our favorite TV character every 22nd.

March has the Day of Secret Collections, when you reveal your bad collection of (fill in the blank) to the world.

April is the annual Dork Pride parade.

May 1st all of the Rennaisance Faire (don't forget ye olde "E") folks dance around the maypole.  The Beavis contingent then laughs (heh heh, they said pole).

June is reveal your pasty white legs to the world day.

July 5th has free burn treatment at the ER.

August has bring your drinks to work day.  Followed quickly by "avoid eye contact with smokin hot co-worker you may have shared a little too much with the previous day" Day.

Ah, September.  When all the Dork moms don thier pictish blue face paint and brave the school drop offs to get their first day of back to school freeeeedom!!!!!!

October remains unchanged, because who could top Halloween for letting your Dorkk flag fly?

November sees the vokda based slushy drinks wedged into the snowbanks, in a grand evening involving bonfires and the occasional naked snow angel.

December is the Twelve days of Christmas Cookies.

 

5. What luxury items would you own?
I would have a woman that came to wash my hair, like at a salon.  I would also have a mute buddhist monk to cust my hair in absolute silence.  No fake chit chat.   

6. What charities would you support or represent?
I would support the Zamphir School of Asshole Management and Rehabilitation, and one of their shock collars would have a  little brass plate with my name on it as a donor. 

 

I tag any dork willing to play, and we'll repost them over at dorkbloggers if you tell me you're playing.