Wednesday, November 29

Thursday Thirteen #20-Fantasy Gifts

If someone could see to it that any one of these things is under the tree this year, I'd be terribly grateful. These are my 13 fantasy gifts for this year. I had a clever graphic for y'all, but My techno-chaos made it go haywire, much like my wierd technorati placement...sigh. Here ya go, anyway.

1. Consuelo, Our new housewife. Consuelo is just happy to be here, and loves cleaning and laundry. She only cooks traditional Mexican fare, so the honey loves her, and she does all the dishes, so I love her. She speaks Spanish so Little O can learn, and she adores Mama Dina, and has lots of juicy hometown gossip for her. Did I mention she’s magic and if I prick her with a pin, she pops like a soap bubble and re-appears when I wave the toilet brush? Or she might be like a Roomba, and just emerge when we’re not home and get it all done…hmmm, I’ll have to give this more thought before I talk to Santa.
2. A real bedroom set, involving either a lovely sleigh bed OR an ultra modern platform—super clean lines.
3. A week at a beach house with MY family, not his. I love his, but I want a week with MY family. I see his all the time.
4. The gods of employment present a job that actually makes money for my Ex, so I could ask for child support (at this point I’m afraid to file because I think I make more), and co-incidentally, the Honey is given a high paying job sampling beer.
5. POOF! My car is paid off!
6. If he can’t be given a job drinking beer, maybe he could just stop for a while…
7. My son is transformed into a straight A student, practicing his trombone without being forced, cleaning his room so Consuelo doesn’t have to.
8. Diamond Earrings the size of hailstones. Not even golf-ball sized hailstones, just something visible from space. (I am being scolded by my cubicle-mate for being practical AND wanting magic tricks instead of THINGS).
9. A ten thousand dollar gift card for Cost Plus, or, actually, Target. I could do some serious damage. Pier 1 would be nice, but not nice like Cost Plus.
10. A laptop with wireless internet that goes the speed of LIGHT. Next year I am not blogging in November, I am going to PARTICIPATE in NaNoWriMo. I’m dragging my father and my brother with me. You, too, Kat!
11. If #6 is out, maybe a half naked cabana boy with washboard abs and, tragically, an inability to speak. He still HAS a tongue, let me be clear, but no speech. He can, however, laugh at my witty asides, and appreciates my inability to clean. I’ll even share him with Consuelo if I never have to scrub anything, and never HEAR about it.
12. Hawaii. Cabo. Dublin. Fiji. Barcelona. Any of these would be acceptable.
13. A 4-bedroom house—we need an office for the computer and the Honey’s out of control sports crap, er, memorabilia. The computer currently lives in the middle of the dining room, and Little O sleeps in our room. When she outgrows that toddler bed we are so screwed…

Here's alittle Linky Love if you're feeling like you could be my Santa...


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37 comments:

Susan Helene Gottfried said...

LOVE it!

Funnily enough, you're the second person this week who's told me they are screwed when their kid outgrows the toddler bed. NOT the sort of thing you expect to hear every day, huh?

Missy said...

A great list! I may have to a list like this one just to see what I can pull out of my imagination.

Janet said...

hahaha GREAT list! I especially liked #11 ;-)

i am jen [with1n] said...

What a great list! Thanks for sharing...
Happy TT!

DKRaymer said...

Now see, in my little world, this list would not work. Consuela would run off with the Cabana boy right before the huge dinner party I'd planned for 2 months. I would get stuck cleaning the house, drop one of my hail stone sized earrings in the toilet and have a nervous breakdown. Happy Thursday! Thanks for stopping by and leaving such a lovely comment:) You made my day.
DK
http://aflyoverblog.typepad.com

Le laquet said...

A sleigh bed and a house keeper *sighs* ah well back to reality!!

Just Expressing Myself said...

I hope you get them all - especially number 4.
Have a marvelous Thursday,
Frances

Mags said...

Oh to have my car paid off too!!

Courtney said...

This reminds me of my favourite game: If I had a billion dollars.

Brit said...

Great list! Good luck with everything on your list! :)

Cool TT

kelli said...

I would just love for #5 to be a gift for me too! Happy TT!

Jennifer said...

I loved your list, you really make me laugh! #1 was the best!

happy TT!

Jenny

Skittles said...

Ahhh.. if only :)

kristarella said...

I'm so glad I have a room for our computers! It would be nice having them in the living room.
Hope you get something good! I'd like #1 too.

scribbit said...

I'd love Consuela! I'd gladly leave changing sheets to someone else.

Chelle Y. said...

We can all dream, can't we? :)

Wendy Ann Edwina D'Cunha e Pereira said...

i loved the list.... really nice fantasies....I think I share quie a few too...

KarenW said...

Great wish list! I just want my own personal jet so we don't have to take 30 hours to fly home.

DivaP said...

Great list - I'm going to put World Peace and full tummies for all the kids in the world on my fantasy Christmas list!

Knitting Maniac said...

I would love # 10 too!

Thanks for stopping by!

Tink said...

*LOL* I love your list! Some of those items are definitely on my wish list too. :-)
My TT is about Sinterklaas.

Mikala said...

Now, that's my kinda list - that's awesome! Great idea.

Karri said...

Great list! I don't think I can make a list like this, I wouldn't know what to put on it!

Stephanie said...

Ha ha ha... love the list!

Sparky Duck said...

Hmm, maybe Consuelo could be like that maid on the Jetsons?

And whatever Island you dont get, Ill take the leftovers.

Christie said...

ooohhhh $10k at target!!! i could do some serious damage too! funny list! happy tt!

The "Mind" said...

This is a great list!

the Honey is given a high paying job sampling beer.

Particularly has me giggling. Pman would love a job like that.

Mike said...

an interesting list to be sure. Happy TT.

Nancy said...

LOL! I so need a Cousuelo. And, I want a new job....

chelle said...

'd loveeeee to get all of that under my tree too. Santa sure has a lot fo work to do.

annie said...

Great list!
A real bedroom "set" would be perfect! :)

TopChamp said...

This is a great post - I like the idea very much.

crse said...

WHAT AN AWESOME LIST!!!! Baby, we all need those cabana boys you know?

Pippajo said...

Great, great list! The only thing I would add personally would be for me to wake up 50 lbs thinner! Or at least with recognizable ankles!

It's nice dreaming, ain't it?

huberama said...

So great. Mine's named Helena. But Consuela works, too!

clumsyraine said...

I'll talk to Santa for you, but I might have to borrow #s 2, 5, 9, and 13 in return :)

bananas62 said...

I like the cabana boy!!!!!I will name mine Roberto. (rob) for short! I have one in mind too!

I'm finally done with my blogging assignments jen.....check me out!