Saturday, May 12

Fame

Once agan, Pendullum has an awesome tale.

My only brushes with the rich and famous?

1. That drunk Bastard, Merle Haggard, tried to play chicken with me in 1990. Now I will admit, Redding has some of the craziest one-way, no two-way!, now back to one-way streets ever to tangle a traffic pattern. But if you find yourself going the wrong way down a suddenly two way street, don't honk and scream at the chick following the traffic laws, MOVE YOUR DRUNK ASS OVER.

2. Steve Perry (of Journey fame) caused heart palpitations all over the Hanford Mall when he strolled through. Now we used to tell people that Hanford had the three big C's--Cows, Cotton, and Convicts. (Corn belonged on that list too, but it messed up the flow.) In that horrifically flat central valley Ag community, you were a farmer, you were related to a farmer, or you were living there to be closer to daddy. There are three major prisons in the area, hosting Charles Manson and Sirhan Sirhan among others. My best Jen and I were spending another barely-above-minimum-wage day at the bookstore and two guys came in with a kid about eleven (?). They kicked it at the counter and chatted us up for a while, gave us bizzarre advice on our jewelry, and eventually meandered on down the mall. They were entertaining in an otherwise boring day, but whatever. The thing that made it memorable was that on my lunch I went shopping, and the big girl behind the counter at Lane Bryant was hyperventilating.

She could not believe that she had missed STEVE PERRY (another bout of panting). Ooooooh, THAT's who that was. Yeah, he was pretty funny.
(SQUEEEEEALLLL!) Ohmigosh, did he sing for you?

What? Did he SING for us? WTF? I understand hostile celebrities after meeting that girl. I would be hostile, too.

There will be a book post soon. I got a free book (squeee!). But it arrived after my tax check, and I had just invested in a fat stack of Sci-fi that I had been dying to read, so book post soon, I promise!

6 comments:

ditzymoi said...

steve perry?????? *squeeeeeeeeeeel*

toooo f'in funny... he was such a geek!!! even at his height of fame lol

ZigZagMan said...

I would however love to roll one and toss a few beers back with Willie Nelson....just for grins..:)

Ash said...

GAWD, you know I'd be that obnoxcious girl,SING FOR ME YOU CELEBRITY PERSON, YOU!

Pendullum said...

Too bloody funny!!!

Not So Anonymous Michelle said...

Oooh, Steve Perry...hehehe!

crse said...

oh my god. Can I tell you that i love you just that much more for a phrase like "that drunk bastard merle haggard?"