If this could be me...

scale, originally uploaded by auntnanny.

I am, sadly, not this weight, which would be two pounds over my uppermost healthy weight-to-height ratio. I used to hover between 170 and 175. I am a big girl. I used that to justify a lot of bad eating habits in my life.
I appreciate that my Honey still loves me in my current form, but I struggle to make him understand that I need to severley change the way we live. He gets off work very late at night, and wants me to eat with him when he gets home. He stops by the 7-11 on his way home, and gets "treats" for everyone.

*okay, sidebar. How can I convince him that mini marts are the dietary and fiscal equivalents of beastiality? He LIVES out of mini marts. I've lived around the corner from this 7-11 in one home or another for 10 years, and I had never been inside until my Honey dragged me in. Now they recognize me from our trips. ACK.*

When I embarked upon this little weight loss challenge of mine, I toyed with Atkins, or South Beach. But then I decided to try just basic, sensible eating first.

That's when it hit me that I've probably eaten 1-3 Haagen Daas bars A WEEK for the last two years. F*ck me. That's obscene, but it totally snuck up on me. I thought it was so sweet that he brought us treats.

So now I choose Diet Dr. Pepper for my treat. I'm trying to eliminate carbonated beverages altogether, and I hate the aftertaste of diet drinks (the aftertaste is sort of what I imagine crushed ants would taste like--ugh), but sometimes something sweet and fizzy is perfect in the summer. I cook a little more and go through drive throughs a lot less, but I'm not going to stop everything altogether, becasue I think that I would fall back into the old habits with a vengance. I'm trying to gradually and subtley steer my family back to a sensible healthy way of life. Re-form our healthy habits, and gradually drop the bad ones.
Am I deluding myself to think that this is a better option? That a little McDonald's is okay, as long as it's not a constant?

I thnk my honey is going to be a challenge. When we go up to see my folks, they serve healthy portion sizes, and then say good night and go to bed. And I think "but wait...I want more- oh, okay, goodnight guys" and settle in for the rest of my night. But within a few hours, the Honey is DYING for something more. Begging me to go and forage for him. HE is a consumer, and I have become one , as well--and it all goes back to the mini marts.

I'm just going to say it. Last month I was at 228. This month was 223, which ought to be progress, but remember, I have always had a five pound variance. This next month will be the real test, to see what I lose. I have to be down to 205 by the beginning of October in order to qualify for final weigh in, and the annoyying accountant at work is a faithful weight watchers attendee. I refuse to let my eating decisions rule my life, but I have to get off my ass and start exercising or I am DOOMED. DOOOOOOMED!!!!!!!!!