Thursday, August 31

Thursday 13 #9?

Thirteen Things Jen enjoys (or would like to)

1…. I would like a zen beauty parlor. What do I mean? Shut up and cut my hair. I get to escape my kiddos once every four to six months, I do not have a personal relationship with any hairdresser in town, please do not try to bond with me while you are shampooing my hair (I'll slip you an extra ten if you can make it a forty five minute hair wash--God I love that part!), and shhhhhh... listen to the snip snip snip. Ask me relevant questions if you must, but oh, a fountain and a cucumber water, and silence. Bliss. When I told my Honey this, he was horrified, he WANTS them to talk to him, and is offended if they don't. So you'd have to have just a zen room where they understand to shush.

2. On that beauty note, how about a soundproofed childcare room with video monitoring? I would happily pay extra if it meant I didn't have to co-ordinate daycare. The best part about shopping at the Cookie Lee showroom, is that they provide free childcare, with a constant video feed so you can check on the rugrats without peeking around the corner and upsetting them.

3. Okay last salon issue...can we add a zen manicurist in there? That way your english skills are not an issue, and can we bring back the hand massage? When I was in high school my manicures included a hand massage that was heaven. The little bling nails 2000 type salons don't do squat for you.

4. You should understand that I love a gimmick. The cheesier and more obnoxious the better. I love a GOOD happy meal toy. Something with a shelf life beyond a day and a half. Some of those toys are EPIC and still fun four years later.

5. Fruit in happy meals. Fruit on the menu at all at a drive thru.

6. I see on the web that there are healthy drive thrus out there, serving good wholesome food. Just not here. But we've got a drive thru Starbucks!

7. Vapor Patches for little ones instead of smearing goo which invariably got into Big O's eyes or mouth when he was still my little o. Don't ask me how, but it always happened.

8. Used Bookstores. We have 300,000 people and ONE used bookstore.

9. Target's dollar bins. Target in general.

10. America's Test Kitchen on PBS.

11. Lately, Real Simple Magazine. The prices on clothes are horrendous for the real world, but everything else is lovely.

12. Digital Cameras. I just cannot believe how many bad, blurry photos of my brother's eighth grade graduation we have, or maybe I cannot believe that the crappy 110 camera from 1978 failed to capture more than 3 good photos of my brother's big blond 'fro.

13. Novelty socks. My honey brought me a pair of funny socks, and I would so rather get those than a stuffed animal. I took part in a funky sock exchange a few months back, which was essentially a chain letter where you only put two names on the letter, the person who sent it TO you (Karen), and yours, and the six friends you sent it to sent one pair of socks to Karen, and their friends send one pair to you, etc. Theoretically you get 36 pairs of socks for the one pair that you send... I'm such a sock junky that this was perfect for me. I figured I'd get three pair (36 pairs, my *ss), and I actually netted 5. yay!

Links to other Thursday Thirteens!

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

Wednesday, August 30

The truth revealed...

I am nerdier than 35% of all people. Are you nerdier? Click here to find out!

Yeah, there isn't enough alcohol in the WORLD to make me sign up for additional math courses. I kinda thought I'd flunk out on the nerd rating.

I cheerfully stole this from Casual Slack, and I scored higher than Jen, but I think that's because I have no social life that does not involve a keyboard--or a family member. She has fabulous weekend plans. I think I'm cleaning my house.

But I'm not much of a trekkie, either. My ex-husband could ace this:

Click here to take's Star Trek Quiz.

Kiddos home sick--what fun

WHO are you?

I totally stole this from Sayre's blog but it had to be done!


Rock & Roll Name: Posy Allegheny (first pet + Current Street Name)

Movie Star Name: Bleema Whatchamacallit (Grandfather/Grandmother's name on mother's side + favorite candy)

Fly-Girl or Fly-Guy Name: J-Mic (first initial of first name + first 2 or 3 letters of middle name)

Detective Name: Peacock Sloth (favorite color + favorite animal) Sounds more like a bad cartoon villain.

Star Wars Name: Fikjegr Re (first 3 letters of last name + first 2 letters of first name + first 2 letters of mother's maiden name + first 2 letters of the town you grew up in) Break it up however you want to.

Terrorist Name: Elehcim Redirg (middle name backwards + mother's maiden name backwards)

Tuesday, August 29

Awesome--photo won't load--stupid Blogger

They kicked ass, as you might have suspected. The funniest part was watching SIL shut down all pipes in a three row ring around her daughter. And everyone was very cool about it-- I have to admit, The honey and I were stunned at how well people took her request.

It was the first concert for both SIL and Fabu-Niece, and I'm glad they got to see a real blow your mind and your ears concert. My first concert was Power Station. ahem. It was the eighties, and Duran Duran was no more (we thought). By the time we got to go to the concert, we had both moved on musically, but my best friend (yet another Jeni) got tickets from her dad, and off we went to the Cow Palace in SF. After swearing to my parents that we would never leave his sight, Jen's dad waited in line with us and then told us where to meet him afterwards, because he'd sooner slit his wrists than go inside. Coolest Dad EVER.
The opening band was OMD. After that, I had to wait for Day on the Green at the Oakland Colliseum in 87(?) for U2, Pretenders, Hooters, and the BoDeans. I think we all know how that went. It was the Joshua Tree tour. 'nuff said.
Then in '91, another Day on the Green for Metallica, Queensryche, Faith No More, and Soundgarden. My date was a very pretty boy with big blue eyes and absolutely no common sense. He bought three hits for five bucks from some guy in the crowd, took them all, and proceeded to flip out. We had to park him halfway through Queensryche, and had to SIT on top of him for the entire Metallica set. The alternative was to let him get killed by the bikers whose asses he insisted on grabbing--male, female, front, back--he thought it was all just needing to be groped. Everyone was pissed (we went with his cousin and HIS girlfriend) , and when it was all over we went to IHOP and locked him in the car while we ate. That was the end of THAT relationship!
I went to see Robert Cray, then the Eagles, then Los Lobos (may I say, the most UNDERRATED rock n roll band ever), then another round with young Bob. Now the Chili Peppers. Not enough live music in my life!
I was grateful to not be the oldest, the geekiest, the fattest, or the most uncool. Fabu-Niece is such a cool kid. We were fascinated by the sign language interpreter rocking out down on the floor. What a killer job. We had terrible seats for the band but good for people watching.
What was your favorite concert?
AC/DC is my ring tone on my cell, but I would be afraid to see them at this point--what if they are old and bad? I don't think they've gone to the county fair circut yet, but man, I think I'll keep the fantasy. I'd still love to see Rush, Foo Fighters (Weezer opened for them last year-can you imagine what a show that would be?) , I'd see U2 again any day (same for Bob and Los Lobos). That's it, all I've got for tonight.
Who would you most like to go see?

oh, and Blogger sucks--go to flickr and check out other people's chili pepper photos--it was just like that!

Monday, August 28

Operation Lose That Ass: update

ugh. I know, I talk a lot of shit, but I think my momentum has withered. Wilted on the proverbial vine. The boss still has not brought his scale in, and I have no clue where I stand. Oh, the funny pants still fit, but I feel more like the stay puff Marshmallow man than someone who's going to be posting photos of my slimmer self in a month and a half.

I'm also feeling very old, as the Honey's niece, whom I adore, has chosen US to go with her to the Red Hot Chili Peppers tonight. Her mom got her tickets for her birthday on the condition that she take adults with her, and she chose the Honey and myself. I love this kid. She figured we had at least heard of them. The Chilis had been around back when I was high school, shite, twenty years ago...yes, thank you, we've heard of them. The problem is that I was never super into them, and Californication just about finished that off. Could the radio stations have played any song more to death?
But they are cool, and it's live music, and we're going. I told her we're going to show up with the little fans around our neck to blow the pot smoke away from her--she kinda turned green. Should I go out and find one just to further panic her? I wish I did not feel ancient and large. sigh.

Friday, August 25

Me Likey!

Your Career Personality: Original, Devoted, and Service Oriented
Your Ideal Careers:
Art director, Book editor, College professor, Composer, Film director, Graphic designer, Novelist, Stage actor, Psychiatrist, Writer

Please note that nowhere on this list do the words "Personal Trainer", Aerobics Intructor," or "Health Nut" appear.

tee hee--What a geek.

Okay, in an epic post to my own geekiness, I have some other confessions.

It cracks me up when the word verification in (I think) wordpress tells me that I have to re-type the letters to prevent robots from posting. Excuse me? Robots? Couldn't you call them spammers, or automated systems, or even just computers? Because honestly, I just picture the robot from Lost in Space sitting at the computer reading blogs. Can I also tell you that I do a mean impression of that robot shouting "Danger, Danger, Will Robinson!"--complete with arms flailing as I swing back and forth from the waist up. It's really a very impressive sight.


Why are you shaking your head?

I was also a big fan of Star Trek with the ever intriguing Jean-Luc Picard, right up until they made him a Borg. As soon as they had him utter the words "Resistance is futile," it was over for me. Damn "Them".
I've been a geek for a very long time, and while they made a movie called the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, It was First a book. In the mid to late eighties, it was also turned into a computer game that I HAD to have (please, mom? please? Computerland has it, and I'll save up all my money--please mom? pllllleeeeaaaassssseee????????). Arthur Dent and Ford Prefect were forever trapped in the hold of a passing space cruiser because this was before the days of hint books (unless you counted those wierd mad lib things with the invisible ink pens to reveal clues, but there was nothing for THIS game.). I stared at that stupid Amber monitor all summer long, and it didn't matter what I tried-the guard would just shout over and over, "Resistance is Useless!" This was not a graphic game, it was text-only.

Hey, man, it WAS the mid-eighties.

So they ruined Picard for me by having him say the same stupid line (essentially), as the stupid guard at the stupid door. Stupid game.

Great books, though. Revolutionary, really.

Mmmmm...books. Just call me the Homer Simpson of the bookstore.
Not a high brow reader, I read for escape and entertainment. Oprah's book club, while heartfelt and gut-wrenching and life changing, is nothing that I consistently look for in a book.

Any geeks out there in the big wide world? I would highly recommend the Genellan series by Scott Gier. The alien calling her name over the airwaves....that scene has stayed with me for years.

I loves me a strong female character making the hard choices:

Daughter of Empire by Raymond Feist and Janny Wurtz. Phenominal.

Silver Branch by Patricia Keneally. Really a good blend of Sci-fi and Fantasy--and I had a Celtic obsession in high school.

Price of the Stars by Debra Doyle and James D. MacDonald. Rollicking Space Opera, as my uber geek friend Jim would say.

Warrior's Apprentice by Lois Mc Master Bujold. More rollicking Space Opera, not actually a female protagonist, but Miles is very in touch with his Feminine side. :D I cannot start recommending books and not put Miles in there.

The Sacrifice By Kristine Kathryn Rusch. A very different take on the whole fey/fairy thing.

Cautionary Disclaimer: Each of these books begins a series. I do not guarantee that the quality remains consistent throughout the series. But they are kick-ass starts. 'Cause I'm a kick-ass chick. peep peep!

If you have not given your grandmother the Mitford books, get them for her for Christmas. Nothing heavy, not a mystery, not really a romance, they are just delightful escape. I closed the cover on the first book,At Home in Mitford, and I didn't want another book (VERRRY unusual for me)--I just wanted to enjoy the afterglow. Borrow it when she's done.

Good Grief.

This is getting weird. Blogger is now selectively posting my posts and comments.

Is it just me? I cannot post comments to My TT peeps, and my Linky box ate a week's worth of posts and tied everything to LAST Thursday's comments. I finally got that little slice of heaven fixed, but I feel so vaklempt (SP?) about missing all of the TT'ers... sigh. Next week.

Blogger is so distracted by my stunning weight loss that it can no longer function in my e-presence. Yup.

Can I get everybody to give a big salute to Sayre, who lost 12 pounds?!?!?

I'm in awe.

Okay, I'm really green with envy.

No, really, look at my blog, I'm GREEN.

yep, I'm a geek.

Thursday, August 24

Thursday 13 #8--Confessions

Thirteen Confessions about Jen
1…. I am not afraid of spiders, but the television sign off creeps me the hell out. For those of you under thirty, at one point, television stopped each night, usually around midnight.
2...I have hobbit toes--I am the one they are talking about in the summer sandal pledge. But you will all have to be blinded by their ugliness, because I have now seen worse, and I'm not giving up my flip-flops!
3...I have memories of flying as a child--and they are as real to me (in MY memory) as any recollection of christmases past.
4...I really think that my ex is gay, but he doesn't know it, and could never come to terms with it.
5...I think of myself as a feminist, but I really could not care less if the Honey is surfin' porn. More power to him, and maybe a little more somethin'-somethin' for me.
6...I feel like I make my kid even more of an outsider at school by refusing to get cable, but I feel that we have too much idiot box in our lives already.
7...I like some country music. I've always been a music snob, but man, I love something I can sing to.
8...I could be a crazy cat lady...I'm a terrible housekeeper and a packrat to boot.
9...I owe an apology to a friend from years ago for being so judgemental about how she was raising her daughter. I should have been more supportive and maybe I'd have seen that she was spinning out of control.
10...I put the PRO in procastinate.
11...I'm a good speller and a terrible typist. I type for a living. Maybe I should spell for a living?
12...I think I am a disappointment to my parents because I have not made it back to school.
13...They'll have to wait a bit longer.

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

Tuesday, August 22

It's not that easy, bein' green....

Veggie Co-op produce, Week 16, originally uploaded by hpatey.

Sigh. Me and kermit the frog. I'm trying to decide what to make for dinner. Nothing sounds good--but it WILL involve ground turkey and spanish rice (GASP!) yes, a cheap-ass from the box spanish rice--from my friends at rice-a-roni. I know HOW to make real spanish rice, but why? The honey only kind of likes it--For him, it's all about the beans. Real refried beans. I know how to make those, too, but he'll have to EARN those. Going out drinking with the boys does NOT earn you homemeade refried beans. Screw him, maybe I'll just have scrambled eggs. Or not. sigh. Maybe just some cooking, there... probably not. bleah. I want an unlimited grocery budget so I can make fabulous exotic foods. Or I'd like to be taken out to a good dinner, by the man. We went to Garlic Brothers after big O's party, which is always good, and it always lives up to the name, but I want a huge stirfry full of crisp snow peas, and water chestnuts, and carrots, but NOT bell peppers.
Yep. That's what I want.

Oooh, Temptation.

Forget krispy kremes, THIS is my weakness....a chocolate croissant and an ice cold glass of milk...maybe on my birthday..?

Monday, August 21

Operation Lose that ASS, update

Fat Pants Log, August 21.

(I AM a geek, after all)

I do not own a scale. The boss sponsoring the weight loss contest at work has taken his scale home and has not brought it back despite the mewling pleas of the remaining three contestants., but...

I am wearing an absurd pair of beige striped pants that I had put away as unwearable. They are, in fact, 18's, and while I'm still not convinced they would not appear in a glamour magazine "Don't"(with the nifty black box across my ass, I mean eyes), they are once again comfortable. And my work Polo, which was tragically shrunk to pornographic (given my anatomical layout) proportions, is once again fit for decent society. It's loose enough that you cannot count the rolls of backfat or tell the temperature while reading the logo over the left breast (a favorite parlor game of the great unwashed that come into our lobby).

So, Nikki, Sayre, Other hapless OLTA participants, sharpen your poetry skills, because I'll be wanting it in verse. Stanzas, if you will. Can anybody tell me what iambic pentameter really means? I'll leave you with a recommendation:

Oh Yeah, Baby!

Sunday, August 20

I am once again stealing from CRSE

I LIKE this one! To play, go Here and pick the five quotations that call to you, and that you think sum up who you are. I'm not sure I can choose just five.

Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.

Albert Einstein (1879 - 1955),

I believe in God, only I spell it Nature.

Frank Lloyd Wright (1869 - 1959)

Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.

Plato (427 BC - 347 BC)

We act as though comfort and luxury were the chief requirements of life, when all that we need to make us happy is something to be enthusiastic about.

Charles Kingsley (1819 - 1875)

It is easier to stay out than get out.

Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)

Okay, those are my five but here are the runners up:

It is good to rub and polish our brain against that of others

Michel de Montaigne (1533 - 1592)

Like its politicians and its wars, society has the teenagers it deserves.

J. B. Priestley (1894 - 1984)

God is not dead but alive and well and working on a much less ambitious project.

Anonymous, Graffito

It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit.

Harry S Truman (1884 - 1972)

Reality continues to ruin my life.

Bill Watterson (1958 - ), Calvin and Hobbes

There it is, the essential Jen. I think that the Mark Twain quote probably reveals more about me than I had intended...hmm, have to give that some thought. The Charles Kingsley is definitely my philosophy and coping mechanism.

Saturday, August 19

All my pre-teen Pod People..

I don't know how to make this bigger! Posted by Picasa

We did it! We survived!

Krispy Kreme Cake, originally uploaded by supa_jen_10.

The cake was easier than I thought!
Big O made out like a bandit, and The kid with peanut allergies knew to bring his own cupcake! When they were in first grade, this boy had an allergic reaction to something with nuts, and forever after, Big O would tell people he was allergic to something if he didn't want to eat it. I think I have to post these separately...

Friday, August 18

Big Day Tomorrow!

Little O was having Alien envy, so we made her her own very special mask in pink--I may HAVE to add a bow to hers...My uber-boss, who throws us a killer christmas party each year, and is the one putting up the cash for the weight loss contest ($10 per LB, People!), dug around in his desk and came up with some gift certificates for dozens of free Krispy Kreme doughnuts. He gave me everything that he had, which is about fourteen dozen MORE than I'll need. The iffy thing is that they expired in 2003, but in California, litigation central, gift certificates are not allowed to expire, so he thinks I'll be fine. Wish me luck! Posted by Picasa

Thursday, August 17

Thursday 13 #7

Thirteen Things that made JENFACTOR smile in the last week.
1...Shopping with my Best Jen, Something we have not done in at least ten years. Ohmigod, it was heaven to shop with a grown up, let alone the woman who knows me best!
2...Little O says to me, "Mama, you car is talking about Barnes & Noble again..." At this point my mother would like to remind me that I have to teach her that it's the radio, and not my car speaking, but it's so damned funny when she says these things. That's why my mom doesn't read my blog.
3...Talking a little shit to Nikki and the other girls (was there a guy?) involved in Operation Lose That Ass... (another reason my mom does not read my blog...Oh,Jenniferr, you don't have to curse to get your point across...but it's fun and I can't do it in front of the kids!)
4...Coming home from work expecting the usual, and finding out that the honey and the kids have emptied the dishwasher for me without being asked.
5...Big O making a microwave meal for the Honey, which surprised us all..Butt the best part was when I thanked him for making it for the Honey while I was busy, Big O says, "Well, Mom , I kind of HAD to...He doesn't know how to do ANYTHING in the kitchen"-said with wonder and disbelief. YAY! My son understands that this is the wrong attitude for a modern male, and offered to do it for the Honey spontaneously.
6...Went to a Cookie Lee meeting, finally, and it was NOT torture, I LIKEa lott of the new stuff, and I might be able to help a friend earn a little money if she wants.
7...I over-spiced the fruit salad and almost had the Honey convinced I was trying to kill him, but I was laughing so hard I was crying.
8...I have not mentioned work because work has been Hellishly ugly between lack of garbage cans and screaming customers, so Hooray, it's Thursday!!!
9...I met a lady who had just been given a crazy cat lady action figure and showed it proudly to all she met--totally secure in her future as a crazy cat lady.
10...Getting caught up on even one aspect of myhousekeepingg makes it all seem so much more do-able. Thank Goodness!
11...Big O's partay is only two days away, now!!!
12...Little O spoke her Spanishh goodbyes beautifully and clearly to the entire housefull of people at the sister-in-laws... Muy Bien!
13...I found a friend that could have been on my missing persons list, another bookstore friend I'd lost touch with, and someone whom I genuinelyenjoyy...will email her first thing tomorrow to follow up!
Links to other Thursday Thirteens!

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. Its easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

Wednesday, August 16

Am I back?


How Perfect for WTF Wednesday!

WTF happened to my Blog?

No idea what happened or where I went...hope I had fun!

Yesterday's apology was my 100th post! woo-hoo!

Tuesday, August 15

pardon me (hic)

I wash a liddle drunky when I tyuped my posht thish mornin'.

Or I'm a moron, and I cannot type, and posting before 8 am means I do not proof read.

I can't edit from work, as THE MAN has banned blogging. On an interesting side note, my man would like to ban blogging, he's very jealous of the time I spend on the computer, but I almost have him convinced that it's the same time I would spend reading, and a hell of a lot cheaper, considering how I plow through books...

Anyway, sorry about the drunken post. But try the recipe!

I'm not cruel and heartless...

See? now I'm feeling bad about my grilled cheese attack. The official name of this thing is Operation Lose That Ass! So This is what we had for dinner on tuesday.
IT's jsut a big veggie sanshich, but we made a few changes, which I owe to Bre, my personal trainer/co-worker extraordinaire.
We put it on toasted tortillas, I cut out about half of the olive oil and used lime juice, and added cayenne pepper to the beans. Bre sprinkled hers with chili powder, but I grabbed the wrong bottle, and it turned out great. How good for you are they? I dunno, but it had to be healthier than McDonalds. So there ya go!

Monday, August 14

RIP Frank & Ernest

Bob Thaves, the creator of Frank and Ernest (SP?) has died. I LOOVED F&E when I was little, and they continued to be funny as I grew up. I think they were one of the first comic strips that I read faithfully, and that I "GOT". They were never mean spirited, but very wry humor.

He would have lots to say about these poor misguided blogger-chicks who think they are going to beat me at this little challenge...OKay, we need a catchy title for this thing...Is it just Drop 2 in 2? Nikki, I'm needing something to build my smack talking around....but I can't check my blog from you've got all day to think of something... I need a cheesy title! (mmm....cheese... Does anyone else crave a really good grilled cheese sandwich right about now? All that buttery, cheesy badness? )

Is that wrong of me?

Sunday, August 13

Okay, one of these is my grandmother.


But it might as well be me!! Posted by Picasa

Further incentive...

Okay, here I go! In a further effort to win the money, I'm adding shame and humiliation to the mix! Per Nikki's rules at Everybody Can Just Bite My Ass, I'm posting a picture and stating out loud that I wear a size 20. The winner of THIS weight loss competition gets the fawning adoration of the losers, posted on our blogs for all to read. I can hadle the brown nosing and groveling, it's the photo I'm hating.

Ha! But now blogger won't upload the photo! I'll have to try Flickr.

SO true.

Shamelessly stolen from Bombadee.

hmmm...not what I would have thought.

Your Personality Is Like Acid

A bit wacky, you're very difficult to predict.
One moment you're in your own little happy universe...
And the next, you're on a bad trip to your own personal hell!

MY guess would have been something leafy and green. Once again, CRSE (who I stole this from, by the way) and I have to face the fact that we may, in fact, have been separated at birth.

Saturday, August 12

If this could be me...

scale, originally uploaded by auntnanny.

I am, sadly, not this weight, which would be two pounds over my uppermost healthy weight-to-height ratio. I used to hover between 170 and 175. I am a big girl. I used that to justify a lot of bad eating habits in my life.
I appreciate that my Honey still loves me in my current form, but I struggle to make him understand that I need to severley change the way we live. He gets off work very late at night, and wants me to eat with him when he gets home. He stops by the 7-11 on his way home, and gets "treats" for everyone.

*okay, sidebar. How can I convince him that mini marts are the dietary and fiscal equivalents of beastiality? He LIVES out of mini marts. I've lived around the corner from this 7-11 in one home or another for 10 years, and I had never been inside until my Honey dragged me in. Now they recognize me from our trips. ACK.*

When I embarked upon this little weight loss challenge of mine, I toyed with Atkins, or South Beach. But then I decided to try just basic, sensible eating first.

That's when it hit me that I've probably eaten 1-3 Haagen Daas bars A WEEK for the last two years. F*ck me. That's obscene, but it totally snuck up on me. I thought it was so sweet that he brought us treats.

So now I choose Diet Dr. Pepper for my treat. I'm trying to eliminate carbonated beverages altogether, and I hate the aftertaste of diet drinks (the aftertaste is sort of what I imagine crushed ants would taste like--ugh), but sometimes something sweet and fizzy is perfect in the summer. I cook a little more and go through drive throughs a lot less, but I'm not going to stop everything altogether, becasue I think that I would fall back into the old habits with a vengance. I'm trying to gradually and subtley steer my family back to a sensible healthy way of life. Re-form our healthy habits, and gradually drop the bad ones.
Am I deluding myself to think that this is a better option? That a little McDonald's is okay, as long as it's not a constant?

I thnk my honey is going to be a challenge. When we go up to see my folks, they serve healthy portion sizes, and then say good night and go to bed. And I think "but wait...I want more- oh, okay, goodnight guys" and settle in for the rest of my night. But within a few hours, the Honey is DYING for something more. Begging me to go and forage for him. HE is a consumer, and I have become one , as well--and it all goes back to the mini marts.

I'm just going to say it. Last month I was at 228. This month was 223, which ought to be progress, but remember, I have always had a five pound variance. This next month will be the real test, to see what I lose. I have to be down to 205 by the beginning of October in order to qualify for final weigh in, and the annoyying accountant at work is a faithful weight watchers attendee. I refuse to let my eating decisions rule my life, but I have to get off my ass and start exercising or I am DOOMED. DOOOOOOMED!!!!!!!!!

Thursday, August 10

Thursday 13

Thirteen Annoying Songs That Jen will get Stuck in your Head!

1. The Chicken Dance!!! My personal elevator music, while waiting for anything. No words, of course, just lots of na-na-na...My boss says this is her favorite. She curses me every time I sing it out loud. And I do sing it.out.loud.

2... The theme to I dream of Jeanie. Again, my personal Muzak, sung while waiting for anything.

3. Lately?The Banana Phone song that I mistakenly played for my kids after finding it on Casual Slack.

4. Following the banana theme, Banana Pudding, by Southern Culture on The Skids. Again, one that my kids loved, that My Honey has taken ownership of, and sings to me at odd times.

5. heeeey good lookin'... whaaaaaaatcha got cookin'...howza bout cookin' something up with me?

6. Won't you take me to....FUNKYTOWN!

7. The theme MUSIC to American Bandstand, but not the words.

8. I sing You are so beautiful to Big O, as loud and cheesy as I can. Little O sings it now, too.

9. The wretched Veggie Tale theme song (although I love their silly songs)

10. The witch doctor song...I told the witch doctor I was in love with YOU, I told the Witch doctor you didn't love me TRUE, and then the witch doctor, he told me what to DO- he said oooh--eee--ooh-ah-ah, ting-tang-walla-walla-bing-bang, ooh-eee-ooh-ah-ah, ting-tang-walla-walla-bing-Bang!

11. Put the lime in the coconut, drink it all up!

12. The 1812 overture, minus the live cannons. We once went on a 3-day road trip when I was a kid, and only had 4 tapes..this was one,along with a beach boys tape, a best of Buddy Holly, and...

13. The Entertainer (which is the piano theme from the movie, The Sting.)
14. Honorable mention goes to MC Hammer U can't touch this!! Whenever someone says one of our trucks is broken down, I immediately launch into Hammer time and slide my hands back and forth on my air keyboards while sliding my chair out from under mein aa left to right motion, while singing the whoaaa, whoaaa. TELL ME that I am only a Moderate to low geek. ACK. I'm afraid, now. What if this means I belong to the dorkus classification rather than the geekus? Cause I have to say, I've never heard anybody shout out their DORK PRIDE..

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Wednesday, August 9

My Gift to my Chilrdren...

Some people pass amazing gifts to their children, like musical ability, or the ability to put paint to canvas and render a masterpiece. Others get the lesser abilities, like you're good with dogs, or a winning smile. Okay, I guess my children did get winning smiles. But the other thing that I have apparently given them is a sleep disorder.

Big O used to get Night Terrors. If you've never been through this, it was waking up in the middle of the night to the sounds of your baby screaming in terror from the other room. We would tear into his bedroom, and he'd be thrashing and screaming. And you know what? That was a good night. The bad nights, he would run frantically through the house, begging us to get him his mama, as I stood there with my arms around him. We were never able to wake him up from them, we just had to wait until he fell back to sleep. The doctor said some kids were just prone to them, just keep him safe and ride them out. Great*thanks.

Last night Little O woke up crying, and was just inconsolable. We asked her why she was crying and she was able to reply that she didn't know. But she couldn't stop crying. She cried for probably a half an hour, maybe forty-five minutes before she finally drifted off to sleep.

Big O eventually stopped, and I'm sure that Little O will get through this phase, as well (this was the second time this has happened, although last time was for a much shorter time), but what have I done to my kids that they go through this? My poor babies.

Love My O's.

Tuesday, August 8

I find this distressing

Your Geek Profile:

Fashion Geekiness: Moderate
Music Geekiness: Moderate
SciFi Geekiness: Moderate
Academic Geekiness: Low
Gamer Geekiness: Low
Geekiness in Love: Low
Internet Geekiness: Low
Movie Geekiness: Low
General Geekiness: None

I am very distraught over this diagnosis! Apparently I really am just socially retarded and pathologically shy! I have NO Supergeek powers!?!?!?

Sunday, August 6

I am so sorry for the misunderstanding!

Big O's Par-tay is not for another two weeks. The bowling alley was booked, and Big O did not want to let go of the concept--He WAS going to bowl! I had just spent Wednesday trying to figure out how the Krispy Kreme thing was going to work, so it seemed like a natural list...

Nachos, Krispy Kremes, and Bowling mean Big O is going to have all of his favorites, and I don't have to think about utensils. But building an impressive mountain of Krispy Kremes (KK) would take me like six or seven dozen. So I was trying to figure out a filler in the middle, and how to keep it contained (on the big stainless platter in the picture) for transport. I think we'll cut them in half around the base and just have the top and bottom layers whole...I only bought a dozen to play with, so we'll see...

  Posted by Picasa

Final results and photos of it all will be appearing on the 20th.

Thursday, August 3

Happy Eleven, Big O!!!

collage, originally uploaded by supa_jen_10.

August 4, 1995

8 lbs 3 oz, 20 inches. Big cocoa brown eyes, little pug nose, beautiful smile... and Frog Fur hair that stood STRAIGHT UP.

He starts the sixth grade this month.

Wednesday, August 2

Thursday 13 #5

DSC00343, originally uploaded by supa_jen_10.

1) Figure out how to make this stewwwwpid Krispy Kreme Cake. Brilliant idea in the middle of my first diet ever.

2) Cut out more of the stewwwwpid (okay, I actually think they are pretty freaking cool) alien heads for the masks.

3) Glue said stewpid heads onto sticks

4) Drop off the payment for the bowling alley.

5) Go to Smart & Final for the nacho boats and cheese...

6) Renew my vow not to bludgeon my ex for inviting extra people to and suggesting bigger, more costly improvements I could make to the party when he is not contributing squat.

7) Find somethng to get Big O (other than his party) for his birthday, because, again, ex=squat.

8) and something from little O.

9) Find more inflatable aliens here in town, no more time and money to order online!

10) Find a tiny alien to go in the top doughnut to make it look like a UFO.

11) Figure out what I am wearing to the party--this sounds lame, but I noticed a few years ago that I get so wrapped up in the par-tay that I don't consider the pictures we will keep for eternity. I look like a homeless person who wandered into the frame in all of Big O's early birthday pictures. Not good.

12) Win the lottery to pay for what is really going to be one of the cheaper parties I've done...must buy ticket.

13) Apologize to my blogging friends for a very lame entry, and a weak Thursday Thirteen posted a day early...

If you have any tips about the Krispy Kreme cake, let me know! so far we're going to cut them in half and wrap around a clear rubbermaid bowl for the base, and maybe throw some glowsticks under the bowl for effect. The top two layers will be full doughnuts, I think. Who knows where this will end up!

Ohmigosh! I did it! I got the linky box to work! YAY!!!!

Tuesday, August 1

DId your town have THAT GUY?

You know the one... he's got his own personal foible that is so distinctive it's become his moniker? Growing up in Redding, we had Plasticman.
This poor man wore his clear plastic raincoat yearround, to keep the "others" from beaming into his brain. Redding was a small enough town that everyone knew someone who had actually spoken to him and gotten his story. He refused motorized transportation, and would wear shorts, but not go without his plastic raincoat.

The town we live in now is just too big to know the backstory of every wanderer obviously moving to his own drummer. But there are two fellows I often wonder about.

There is an asian man, somewhere between twenty and forty, with flowing black hair and a long fu-manchu mustache. He walks EVERYWHERE, and has the most distinctive walk ever. It's sort of a bobbling march. He marches down the street with his long locks waving, and each step brings his knees up to at least waist height. But his other foot must bounce up on the balls of his feet to get the bob and sway he achieves. Maybe he's just very into fitness....He's always neat and clean and well kept. I just wonder about his story.

The other man is in his forties. He kind of looks like that guy who won American Idol. But he walks around barefoot all over town, with his slip on sandals in his hand. The only time I've ever seen him put his shoes on is when he has to walk on grass. It was one hundred and fourteen degrees last month, and there he went crossing the street in his bare feet. That HAS to have a story.

Do you have characters like that in your town?